Kate came into this world two weeks early, a happy baby, spoiling her parents by smiling through her days and sleeping through the nights from day one. She somehow understood that we were “new parents in training” and she was accommodating of our awkwardness, in our first attempts at caring for her. Sometimes it seemed to us that her giggles were an expression of her amusement at our inexperience at nursing, burping, diapering and bathing. At any rate, she seemed to forgive our shortfalls.

We would often say that Kate was an old soul. Looking back now, it seems that she knew, even before she was born, that she wouldn’t have a long time here and every day was to be special and precious. Rarely would there be a time when something wasn’t catching her attention and interest, but on the rare occasion when she was at a loss for something to do, our mantra was, “An intelligent child never gets bored.” That’s all it would take, off she would go on a new adventure, whether it was building sand pies in the sandbox her father built for her (later served up to Dad with a big kiss), climbing her favorite maple tree in order to “look upon foreign lands” (as in a Robert Louis Stevenson poem I taught her), building a tent out of blankets in the living room for a brother-sister camp-in, “helping” Dad with his woodwork hobby, poking her head around to see through his telescope to the stars, playing her clarinet, or helping me garden or cook a special dinner.

On Saturday and Sunday mornings, especially during the colder months when we weren’t outside as much, Phil would fill the house with music, pick Kate up and together they would waltz around the living room. She loved those dances with Dad.

As she grew, she and her father would always look forward to the annual Girl Scout Father-Daughter Square Dance. As soon as it was announced, she would tell her dad to put it on his calendar--it was their special date. Together, they attended those square dances right into high school, even though the last few years she was certainly the oldest Girl Scout present. It always amazed Phil that she still reserved that date, long after her girlfriends had outgrown “dates” with their dads.

Kate was a Girl Scout Silver and Gold recipient. While away at college, she heard about a group of inner city girls who wanted to be in scouting – but had no one to accept leadership. Kate talked to some of her dorm mates and together the girls took on the role of Girl Scout leaders. Kate would call me, asking for suggestions, from my years as a leader and teacher. Then, after the meetings, she would call back brimming with excitement about something that had happened. She truly loved working with the girls and it made her happy to work with girls, who she felt didn’t have all the opportunities she had growing up.

Moss didn’t grow under her feet. Besides being active in scouting, she was co-editor of the Tenafly High School literary magazine, band member, worked with the Tech crew (from high school through college), and even enjoyed trying bit parts in a small theater group. She enjoyed camping and especially loved to go to astronomy star parties with her dad, staying up all night to observe the night sky. She loved to refer to her father as a true Renaissance man; photographer (they spent nights running around Paris taking available light shots); amateur sailor (zipping around Pleasant Bay on Cape Cod together); woodworker (she proudly brought home a foot stool she made in school to show her dad she too could work with wood). She enjoyed horseback riding and sailing, but hated driving. After taking months of driving lessons, she announced that she didn’t want to get her license. She told us that she intended to be a city girl and only public transportation made any sense in the city.

And so, she became adept with taking trains and buses. While at college, she did a stint as an intern at Tribeca Films in NYC. She would get up at crack of dawn to start her trip into the city, praying that the first campus bus of the day was on time, in order for her to catch the metro for the trip into Penn Station and the subway downtown, and then reverse the trip at night. It took her five hours round trip, but she loved traveling by train! She would call almost daily, continuing to allow us to be a part of her new life away from home. The day she literally bumped into Robert DeNiro at Tribeca sent her to the moon and back! And, in true Kate fashion, she excitedly called her mom in the middle of the day to share her “brush” with fame. She made us all laugh.

On one of her days in the city, she became suddenly very sick. She called her dad to come and help her home. He picked her up and took her to the hospital. She was 22 and otherwise healthy. The doctors diagnosed it as an ulcer, gave her medication and had no reason to suspect anything more. Little did we know Kate was much more seriously ill.

Kate graduated with honors from Douglass College, Rutgers University, in May 2003, majoring in Journalism, with minors in English and Political Science. Her father and I were so proud when she came up to us after graduation ceremonies, wrapped her arms around us and said, “I loved coming to this school. Thank you.”

While job interviewing, she came back home to live. I was thrilled to have her home again. It meant that our “sushi lunch/girls shopping outings” were now much easier to arrange. And, it also meant that once again I had someone in the house to discuss politics with, go to indie movies, and to keep me updated on the latest music. Kate spent the summer working for a children’s day school, while she interviewed at publishing houses in NYC. The four of us celebrated being together again in July 2003, when her brother came home from being away at the Air Force Academy in Colorado. Together, brother and sister would go running every night and catch up on their time apart. It was around this time that Kate started itching. Originally, it was thought to be a skin irritation -–possibly from insecticide spray used in the park where she and her brother would run.

One morning, in August, Kate came down for breakfast and I froze. What I originally had thought of as a tan, suddenly looked very yellow. Initially, the doctors thought it was hepatitis, but then came to tell us that they were wrong.

Naively I said, “That’s good! Right?”

“No. I would’ve been happy if that’s all it was. We could’ve treated that. We don’t know what we’re looking at, but from here on out, it’s not good.”

A month later, it was confirmed that Kate had a rare form of cancer, called cholangiocarcinoma--cancer of the bile ducts of the liver. It’s an older persons disease, only very rarely is it found in someone young and hardly ever in someone Kate’s age. The doctors told her she had three to eighteen months to live and to go home and enjoy her time.

With those words our lives went into a tailspin. Phil and I promised Kate that we wouldn’t rest until we could find someone to help her.

Our odyessy took us to four hospitals, numerous doctors, at least 20 invasive procedures, chemotherapy, Brachytherapy and three major surgeries. Through it all, Kate never lost hope and never once said, "Why me?"

Kathryn Anne Lanz Memorial Scholarship

Remembering a Beautiful Life

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We invite all of Kate's family and friends to email us with a message or a story about her. We were all blessed to be a part of Kate's life, and we invite you to share a memorable experience.

Please email us at memories@katelanz.com

We'll continue to post stories as we receive them.

Kate was truly one of the most beautiful people on earth. Kate's warmth and kindness was infectious. Kate was my sister. I remember meeting her at college; it was like finding the other piece to a puzzle. Kate taught me to believe in the kindness of others; she helped me find the better half of myself. Kate taught me what fighting for something really was; she made me a dreamer. I remember that we would sit up late at night in our apartment and talk about our hopes for the future; for husbands, for children, for far off lands. Kate showed me what it was like to positively face the future. The time that Kate was in my life, though short, has had a lasting, profound effect me on me. I thank the Higher Power for giving me the opportunity to have met someone so wonderful yet so humble. Although Kate is no longer with us, she will live on forever in my heart.
Love
Wendy Else Bozzolasco

Dear Mr & Mrs Lanz,

this to let you know that I am deeply sorry in the passing of your daughter, whom I had the priviledge of caring for, @ Holy Name Hospital. I want you to know that I thought her beautiful in spirit and courageous, in facing her unfortunate illness, and it was always nice to see a smile on her face, no matter how bad she felt. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, and may Ms Lanz (as I always called her) rest in peace.
Sincerely,
Amy Francis-Arias, RN

I remember the Girl Scout meetings in your living room, the father/daughter square dances, the trips to the nursing homes and planting flowers in the Commons. I remember that Girl Scout trip to CT when you had to re-assure me all night long that a sea monster wasn't going to come out of the water and eat us as we slept on the rickity old boat (after all, we were only 12!). I remember all the times we tried to play tennnis, but couldn't manage to get the ball over the net. I remember the long walks we used to take, and our talks of poetry, books and music. I remember sharing our hopes and dreams, and thoughts of what we wanted to "be" when we grew up as we prepared to leave for college in the summer of 1998. I deeply regret that we lost touch over the years as there are so many things I would have liked to share wtih you. Your kindness, generousity and courage is an inspiration to us all, and you will remain in my heart forever.
Forever your friend,
Melissa Aprahamian

There were many things I loved about Kate and her personality, but what I think I'll miss the most is her smile. She was easy to pick on and fun to laugh with. I never got tired of seeing her smile or hearing it in her voice. But I think my favorite memory of her will always be seeing her face light up when I surprised her in Jacksonville. That smile meant more to me than she ever knew, more than anything else she could have done.
I consider it an honor to have had the privilege to know her.
Ed Runyon

Kate was a wonderful and caring person. She always had a smile on her face and a good word for everyone. Whenever I would visit Rutgers Kate always made me feel at home. She was very loved by all who knew her, and will be missed. I know that she lives on in all of our hearts; as no one can forget such a brilliant person.
Ali Bozzolasco

We don't know what to say. It...... just came as a shock. Why? She was a beautiful, courageous, young woman. We guess...she was sent to earth to bring joy, faith, hope, and most of all, LOVE. And she did that. But even though she's gone to a better place, she'll still be remembered in all of our hearts FOREVER!
-John & Diane Todd

Dear Phil, Jean and Philip,
Through the time honored traditions of Rick and Anne's many family gatherings, our family has been blessed with a second family. We looked forward to seeing you on so many occasions. Some early memories of Katie were before our own children were born. I remember her love of horses and the ever present smile on her face when she was with her cousins. As the years past, we had children of our own - and Katie was growing into a beautiful young woman. She always spent time with the kids, whether it was hiding Easter eggs, or simply playing a games in the house or in the yard. The most precious memory is one of father and daughter, simply sitting on a sofa together - arms around each other. Her place at the table was usually across from me, sitting beside Philip, their closeness was so evident - it is my hope that my own children share a similar bond of admiration and love. How often did we here the heated debates between Uncle Rick and Katie - neither one willing to give up their position on a particular subject. The pride and joy of a mother when speaking of the events of her daughter's life. A mother's sparkling eyes, a smile and laugh not unlike that of her daughter - she lives within you Jean. It couldn't be missed that her Grandparents truly adored her. Yes, we have so many happy memories of Katie's presence in our lives. She was loved by us and will be greatly missed. How precious and fragile life is. Katie will always be with us- her light will continue to shine brightly .
God Bless Katie
All of our love,
Angela, Bob, Megan and Christopher

We remember Katie coming to the door selling Girl Scout cookies and always with a wonderful smile. Katie was one of the friendlies young girls I've ever met. I remember meeting her in Stop n Shop after the transplant and was so happy to see her looking so well.
Our deepest sympathies go out to you both and young Philip and all the family. This is a young girl that was taken way too early in her young life. We will always remember her and all of you in our prayers.
Love, Carol & Jack Long

I was deeply upset with the news of Kate's passing. Though I only knew her for a short time, I came to find what a beautiful person she really was-even during the worst of times. She was always smiling-and it was an infectious smile. She didn't just smile with her mouth, but with her eyes as well. Although she is no longer with you, she will never be truly gone, as she has left lasting impressions on everyone who knew her.
My thoughts and prayers are with your family at this difficult time.

Lorrie A. Yell, RN, CCTC
Post Liver Transplant Coordinator
Liver Transplant and Disease
4205 Belfort Dr. Suite 1100
Jacksonville FL 32216

Dear Lanz. Family,
I knew Kate in elementary school we both went to TMS and THS and our interests and circles of friends were very different. But what I do remember about Kate is in the 4th grade I came from another country into Mackay school. Kate was one of those few people that made it not so difficult to be in a new school,with new people. I'm now a mother of 2 boys and I cant even begin to imagine what you must be feeling. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Melissa Pitts

Dearest Family,
I can remember Katie as a small child, so bright and always smiling. Very vividly I remember a day long ago in the nursing home visiting her great grandmother, Pani Juzwiak. Katie was maybe five or six years old with Philip around three. There was Philip being the typical little boy, running all around - over the bed, on the bed, in the closet, down the hall and there is this perfect little lady, Katie. She stands there with her left hand on hip, a total look of exasperation saying, "He's so rambunctious". I remember saying to myself that there are not too many adults that could use the vocabulary that this smiling little girl could use. She always had something to say and could talk with any adult as well as she could talk with her peers.
Katie, beyond being very bright, will have a special soft spot in my heart. During Desert Storm when our son Mitchell was over in Iraq, I remember Katie calling and asking me for Mitch's address so that she could write him. From the very large family that we have and the large family that my husband has, Katie at 12 years of age, was the only one that thought enough and cared enough to want to write. And write she did, not even expecting an answer. Mitchell said that never in his imagination would he have thought that Katie would be gone at such a young age.
The last time I saw Katie, I was taken aback with how she was smiling. Knowing that she had a terminal illness, she still continued to smile. We had a wonderful and comforting visit with you all that day and were very happy that we had the opportunity to talk to Katie and you all. When we were getting ready to leave I said to Katie to keep smiling and she smiled that beautiful smile of hers and said, "I will. Everyday I live is like an added blessing". You did such a wonderful job with raising your children. I'm sure that Katie will be your own special guardian angel and will continue to look out for you all. It is our heartfelt wish that every day that passes makes this great loss a little easier to bear and that more and more good memories keep coming back to you to help you cope with this tragedy.
With deepest love and fond memories,
Your Cousins -- Wanda and Roman Rudzinski and Family

I've been meaning to write something for this site, and everything's been so busy, but I've finally set aside the time to send in my story.
I didn't know Katie very well. I had only met her a handful of times, but one sticks in my mind whenever I think of her. In 2000, when I was only 9, my parents and my father's co-worker took me to see a Dar Williams concert, who was one of my favorite singer/songwriters at the time (and still is.) I enjoyed the concert so much, loving her even more live than I did listening to her on the CDs. On our way out of the theatre, my father spotted someone who he thought looked like his cousin, Jeanie. Soon, this woman made her way over to us and it was his cousin, and Katie. We made small talk for our last moments in the theater before we had to leave, and it was nice to see family, considering the Witkowski side is so large I have distant aunts and uncles I've never even met. Although that's the only time I remember seeing Katie, it stuck in my mind because of our similar interest in music.
When my grandmother told me that she was sick, I automatically thought of that concert and how much I enjoyed meeting her. Every time we visited my grandmother we got a new report on how Katie was feeling, and I liked to hear if she was feeling any better. I felt this connection with her, even though I barely knew her at all. Just hearing about her strength and hope just made me feel so good inside. It made me want to try harder to really live my life and never take anything I have for granted.
Then, when I heard that she had passed away, my heart sank. Although it seemed like it was a relief to know that she wasn't living through her sickness anymore, it was still upsetting. When I attended the wake, in between the two, I was able to go to the house and eat and converse with her family. It felt so nice to hear such wonderful stories about her. Her family members told us about the silly things she said and did when she was little, and the many accomplishments she achieved when she was older. Hearing these stories made me want to be just like her. To accomplish so many wonderful things, and to mean so much to so many people. What meant the most to me probably, was when Jeanie approached me and said,
"On one of the last days, when I was sitting with Katie, she mentioned that time we saw you at the Dar Williams concert."
Just hearing that made me eyes well up. To know that she felt that same importance and actually remembered that day as I had made me feel so wonderful. Sometimes the simplest incounters can create this connection that cannot be explained.
I miss her more and more every day, and just thinking about her and her story helps me to put my life into perspective. I know that I didn't know her very well, but I wish I did. I wish I could have become closer with her, because I feel that we would have had a lot in common. Now, God wants her back with Him in Heaven. She did her job here on Earth, and she touched so many people while here.With all my love,
Emily Witkowski (Kenny's daughter)